Conflicted.

Thursday 29th of October, 2009
It is such a difficult thing to undertake this journey into self when you have another’s needs to consider. It seems to be such a very thin line that separates attending to one’s needs from being seen as selfish. I feel I am failing dismally at this today and things are not good right now. Even writing about this does not feel good right now.
I have no answers, just a desperate need for peace and silence. Yes silence!! I have been thinking for quite some time that a retreat is necessary. Words at the moment do not seem to facilitate communication let alone understanding. For the first time in my life I have discovered the spoken word to be a pointless waste of time. It is never received in the manner in which it was given. It takes so much effort to help people understand me at the moment. The written word seems to be my only ally at present.
And prayer!!!!!!!!!!